One step at a time

It’s hard not to feel melancholy when you’re unwell. You feel lousy, vulnerable and often, if it’s bad enough, you’re prevented from doing the simplest things that you would otherwise take for granted. Other than my trip to hospital I haven’t been outside at all. I can still barely get out of bed and I’m battling to stay positive even though I know positivity is crucial to my getting better. I haven’t worn clothes in over a week, a natty array of nightwear yes, but no day clothes and each day is dominated by the alarm that goes off at 9am, 12 noon, 6pm and 9pm to signify I need to take more pills.

You also start to realise how much the person who is looking after you – in this case my lovely girlfriend – is actually doing, and so you start to feel guilty as well. I have arranged for some flowers to be delivered for her at work today. 60 Cornish daffodils! I thought they would make the perfect thank you and cheer up her office at the same time. At the moment, she is taking care of herself, the dog and me as well as working a demanding job...

I'm also going cold turkey. I'm not allowed to buy stuff. Normally, I just flick through the world wide interweb buying pretty much anything that takes my fancy but no more. I've decided (a) I have enough stuff (b) I need to be more fiscally responsible and restrained, especially as soon I will be a married woman. Not having been married before I'm not 100% certain, but my understanding is you just have to be much more grown up when you're wed - about everything! And so it starts here. Just when I could do with some cheering up, my wallet is closed for business.

Anyway, I do have goals (you’ll be delighted to hear), tomorrow I’m going outside. I’m not sure what I’ll do when I get there, but watch out world! Friday I want to go for a little drive, Saturday we are doing some grocery shopping and then friends are coming for tea and cake. Actually that sounds quite a lot, lol?! Anyway, Sunday will just be about resting and preparing to return to work.

Right now I need to sort out some breakfast which is a nice thought because a couple of days ago I couldn’t even do that! Progress indeed!

Diaries of a house wife

I’m feeling better. Isn’t it remarkable how quickly the old fashioned things work: rest, plenty of juice and water, Murder, She Wrote… OK so there’s less medical evidence for the last one but I swear by it…

Today I’m going to try and do some housework. I made a start on being a good housewife yesterday by making apple muffins for my beloved’s breakfast this morning and then puff pastries with squash, organic bacon, sage, salt and pepper with rice and vegetables. Very delicious and I was immensely pleased with myself. But today there’s tidying and laundry to do and despite having a large kitchen the washing up is threatening to spill out into the hall...

Tomorrow it’s off to Cornwall. There’s been severe weather warnings issued across the country, which is a little worrying. Hopefully it misses us but better pack the wet weather gear!