Dolly 2

In four days I’ve been made redundant, had a car crash, gone to Cardiff, seen Dolly Parton, been to Battersea to get another dog and had a biopsy. Oh, and we went to Asda. S’all go!

I picked up my friend J on Friday afternoon so we could drive to the concert in Cardiff and while stationary at lights a car went into the back of us. I went postal. I got out the car and yelled what the fuck have you done?! Not helpful but as I’m sure you can appreciate, I was a little vexed. Anyway, we pulled over and remarkably and I do mean remarkably, there appeared to not be a scratch on Maddy (our car!), the boot closed fine and subsequently when we left, she drove fine. Not a scratch. Thank god I didn’t have my handbrake on and was first in line to pull off when the lights changed; so when the car impacted we rolled forward and then I applied my brake. However, I am going to have the car checked over for any damage my inexperienced eye cannot detect. I have since had a sore upper back and neck and a headache as well, but here’s the thing – I am a bit stressed at the moment so I don’t know whether these symptoms are as a result of the accident or as a result of a tension headache because I did have a headache before the accident and my shoulders do get very sore as a result.

Anyway, the rest of the journey was uneventful and we arrived safe and sound. The hotel was lovely! Very posh. We had a deluxe twin room and spent a few minutes freshening up before heading out. We ended up at the Kings Cross (ironic really) a gay pub where we ate and had the first of many drinks! Cardiff was crawling with Dollyites and there was a rash of pink Stetsons and tour t-shirts. The concert was at the International Arena and after food we headed over feeling very excited!

The concert was amazing. Absolutely amazing. It was without exception, the best concert I have ever been to and it felt a privilege to be in the audience. She did monologues between songs and was incredibly funny and warm and she had us in the palm of her hand.

Her voice was stunning. She has lost no power with age – in fact her voice is as supple and strong as it has ever been. She did some old favourites like 9 to 5 and Jolene and also material from her new album Backwoods Barbie. She also did an acappella version of Little Sparrow and I cried because truly it was the most beautiful thing I had ever heard. When she tours again, we’ll be there. I resent the ever increasing ticket prices of concerts and it really puts me off, but I don’t care what she charges next time, my partner and I will definitely go. To think I grew up listening and loving her music and for some reason assumed I’d never be lucky enough to see her live. Just goes to show you!

After the concert we headed back to the bar and got very merry and then headed back to the hotel bar and got merrier still! Other than some idiot smoking where s/he shouldn’t and setting off the fire alarms, we slept very well that night.

I got home Saturday afternoon feeling happy and tired and went to a bar-b-q in the evening but by 9.30 I was practically asleep so we headed back home.

We had discussed getting another dog and then by serendipity, we found Bess. Bess is between 5 and 7 and a Staffie/Mastiff mix. She had been kept in a small concrete yard and been used as a breeding machine. She was got rid of and rescued by Battersea and now lives with a fosterer (who is a fantastic woman) because she became very depressed in kennels. We all met for the first time yesterday and fell in love! She’s a quiet and very gentle lady that would just like a home to call her own and lots of love. We’re setting up a play date at Epping Forest next week so Bess and Pluto can meet and then hopefully we’ll go forward with the adoption. The family is growing!

Finally, this morning, I had to have another biopsy on the lump in my neck. (You can’t actually see it just in case you feel compelled to stare… although as I think I’ve said before it would make a change from people staring at my breasts…)

I find the whole thing painful and stressful and unfortunately we discovered this morning, that the lump has grown. I will get the test results in a couple of weeks but in the meantime I have to meet a surgeon in case it needs to be removed. Bit of a bummer but nothing I can do.

So for once I don’t feel pathetic when I say, I’d just like a day in bed please!

(The pictures perhaps don’t need explaining but one is of Bess and one is of Dolly! I didn’t know how to use my partner’s camera and so took lousy pics at the concert, but this one is at least recognisable.)

Dolly 1

Dolly was AWESOME! Will blog tomorrow...

Decision

Well for those loyal readers hanging on to my every crisis, I'm taking redundancy. Yep, I talked it over with the wife and it was a no-brainer really. I feel excited and full of energy. (And already making plans for the 2 months I'm taking off to be a perfect housewife, lol!)

I won't exactly miss the place either. Let's face it, my life goals are clear: to have a small farm in the middle of nowhere surrounded by kids and animals and visiting friends and, to write full time. It doesn't exactly tally with working in a stuffy office, being prevented from doing my job well and stressful commutes!

At least I can use the time off to find us a house in Cornwall.

Before you think it was too easy, I did actually spend almost all of last night staring at the ceiling unable to switch off my brain. I think I thought of everything - serious and trivial alike, but it's the right decision and I'm just grateful I can make it.

In fact suddenly I feel very aware of all that I do have to be grateful about. Isn't that strange? Not that it's a bad thing, we take too much for granted at the best of times, but it's like I have becomely acutely aware of the fact my life is a charmed one. Yes, we have bad weeks and ups and downs and even some very serious stuff to deal with but then I look at what I have and feel that my life has balance and meaning and pleasure. And it's because of those things, and those people that I can make this decision and be brave!

I'd better be one hell of a housewife!

Tonight we're off to Cardiff to see the wonderful Dolly Parton, a legend long before the word became cheapened and virtually meaningless. I'm so excited and on that note, need to get going - I have so much to do today before I can even think of hitting the road.

Enjoy your weekend. I know I will.

So long, fare well...

Well, its official, I’m to be offered a redundancy package. I think I should be upset, or worried, but actually I feel excited and a bit nervous. The nervous part is obvious: it’s better to be in work than out of work, especially when you have responsibilities, but the excited part is less obvious. I hate my job so maybe this is exactly what I need? Maybe I can sense something much better is just around the corner? I really don’t know. I’m due to have a meeting this afternoon to discuss it further but I will then take the weekend to talk to my partner and have a good think about what to do…

I think the part that makes me really a bit scared is that although I’m very employable and have a great CV, I’ve been out of work before and its soul destroying. Admittedly I didn’t have a part time business which I do now (Dog Wise) and my life is much better organised and financially more secure but really, unemployment sucks. Don’t let anyone tell you any different. The first couple of days, weeks even, you really love it: you wake up when you want and then you don’t have to face a stressful commute and bullshit at work, but after that the worry creeps in. What if I can’t get another job? What if I’m washed up? What if my partner has to support me? What if we become really short of money? What if I become addicted to Cash in the Attic? What if I start to eat too many biscuits and washing only every other day, and then every other week…?!

So there you have it. All change on the western front… grab life by the balls or it will kick you in the arse… or something like that anyway.

In the meantime though, I just need to get through this meeting about the redundancy and then I shall head home and open a beer and sit in the garden with my dog and my chickens and count my blessings.

And of course, I have Dolly to look forward to as well!

Dolly in Cardiff!

I'm going to see Dolly Parton in Cardiff with a friend of the 4th July (how appropriate, yehaa!) Anyway, I'm uber excited as you can imagine and have just booked our hotel. 4 stars and with all sorts of fancy pants extras like jacuzzi and an indoor swimming pool. Shame we're only there for one night!

Play a song for me Applejack...

Why is American politics more interesting than British politics? Apart from the amounts of money they spend on their election campaigns which I personally think is obscene, I am far more interested in politics across the water than I am in my own backyard.

I am, on a scale of 1 to 10 a 6 or 7, when it comes to being politically engaged. I vote, I write to my MP on issues that concern me or which I think need highlighting, I have a good understanding of current affairs, I sign petitions, I read the broadsheets and although I have a favourite paper, I don’t confine myself to just one news source. But sometimes, British politics is as dull as a dull thing and when you have Hils’ and Obama slugging it out politicians such as Cameron and Brown just fade into the background. In my defence what happens in Washington does have a massive impact on the rest of the world; just look at W’s reign of terror. The only leader to devise international and domestic policies using alphabetty spaghetti…

I’m feeling philosophical today. I have the post-holiday blues. Fighting through traffic, ignorant drivers, sitting in an office, wading through emails I don’t really care about… sound familiar? I’m trying to remain upbeat, often people know they want change but don’t know what or when, I have the answer to both of these questions and the determination and resources to achieve everything I want. I am very lucky in that regard. But I am allowing myself to feel a little down because really, I want to be anywhere but in my office today. And yes, if that anywhere was back in Cornwall I would be a very happy budgie indeed!

Our holiday photos should arrive today. I didn’t take all that many, well, probably a lot compared to most people, but not a lot for me. We got some fantastic shots of the dog playing on the beach, one or two we will probably frame. And some gorgeous seascapes of Widemouth Bay.

I’m using my new lunchbox that I purchased in Boscastle. It’s an Emma Bridgewater design with pictures of diggers and tractors and let me tell you, it’s turned quite a few heads already! I figure if you bring lunch in, why not have a stylish lunch box?! Nobody likes squashed and fluffy sandwiches that have been at the bottom of your bag for most of the day…

Well I can’t hide from the grind of the day job much longer, but I can tell you that I am listening to Dolly Parton’s Applejack very loudly on my MP3 and am feeling much better already ;0)

Pouring myself a cup of ambition

I’m off to do a bit of photography this afternoon. It was decided that in light of our upcoming inspection it would be nice to have some original framed pictures of our borough and our housing… it’s a lovely day for it, very nice light.

My mood is much better today as well. Could be something to do with getting a little perspective as well as belting out the best of Dolly Parton on my way to work… either way, I’ve already done lots this morning and I feel back in control or back in the saddle as our Dolly might say… (Still think I need a pay rise!)

So it’s confirmed, we’re off to see this house on Saturday in the wilds of Cornwall. We’re also going to check out a place in Devon which seems rather lovely. Although I suspect not as rural which puts me off. But you need to squeeze as much in as possible when you long-distance house hunt.

Today I sent my alarm later than normal and when I went down to the park with the dog, it was chocka with mutts. Most of who know Pluto so he went round with about 8 other dogs, happily sniffing and running around while I chatted to the neighbours. I got to speak to a nice guy who lives one street away – also a gayer; he has two terriers one of which hates Pluto. Absolutely hates him. He went for him twice today and we don’t know why. Of course, being a rescue he may have been attacked by a black dog, developed a pathological hatred, and you wouldn’t know anything about it, but it is so strange. P was very mellow about it. He barked and snarled back but didn’t attack or get upset. He’s so amazing! Anyway, it is a bit of a shame because this guy is lovely but he gets so embarrassed when his dog plays up. I say slap the little bugger with an ASBO and be done with it…

First it was a nice pub and now Sydenham is getting a bit carried away, because we have a brand new, decent coffee shop and deli called the Blue Mountain Café. I almost crashed the car when I saw it for the first time. It looks lovely and we will definitely be going very soon. Nice independent bookshop (service is a bit hit and miss, but what can you do), nice friendly pub, nice coffee shop… who do we think we are?! Dull-wich?

Happy Halloween!!